


now from the top.

by fairyy



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-07 03:02:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26109889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fairyy/pseuds/fairyy
Summary: Phil learns the WAP dance.
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Comments: 8
Kudos: 36





	now from the top.

“Dan! I can’t do the WAP dance!”

Dan’s got a tutorial pulled out up his laptop. 

“This is so… explicit.” 

“Give the people what they want, Phil.”

“I’m gonna pull my hamstring.”

Dan rolls his eyes. 

“And my knees!” Phil says, pointing at the screen, where the dancer has just dropped down. “By the end of this I’m gonna be dead.”

“Good. The the plan is working.”

“Shut up.”

Dan rewinds the video and starts it again. “It starts with a hitch kick,” he says. 

“My leg does  _ not _ go that high.”

Dan tries it. It’s a decent approximation of the actual step. 

“Wait, what?”

“It’s like -“ Dan shows it again. “Jump from one foot and land on the other.” 

“What the hell - Dan - I cannot do this.”

“Yes you can, it’s not that hard.”

“You have to explain to the doctor when we get to A&E how I broke my foot.”

“Just kick your leg up, oh my god. That’s it - or close enough. And now, drop down.”

Phil does - cautiously. 

“You can do this part, don’t even say you can’t.”

The guy in the video is on all fours, demonstrating how to twerk. 

“Christ.”

Dan goes back and plays it again. 

“He’s not… twerking. He’s twisting his entire body. I can’t do that.”

Dan rolls his eyes. “You can modify it.”

The dancer pops up from where he is on the ground and demonstrates a layout.

“What. What was that.”

“You just pull your legs in… and stand up. Now throw your chest forward.”

“Oh my god. My back.” Dan hits play again. “Wait! How do you get into that…” 

Dan replays the bit they just watched. 

“What the hell.” Phil tries his best to do what’s being shown, getting onto the ground and thrusting his hips. He knows he’s not even close to doing it the way it’s supposed to be done. 

“No Phil, no, you have to bang your arm on the ground at the same time.”

“What the hell,” Phil says again. He manages it, very slowly. 

Phil turns back to the screen. The guy is now in a full straddle split, on his back. 

“The splits, Dan. The splits are not happening.”

“Look you can just do this.” Dan points at the screen, where the dancer is showing a modified version. “Or just roll on your back. Like a fucking cockroach.”

The dancer is shaking his ass on all fours again. “This might be the only part I even get close to.”

Dan laughs. “Yeah Phil. Show them that wet ass philussy.”

Phil reaches over and shoves him. 

“That’s another split!” Phil shrieks, looking at the screen. “An actual split! Do you want me to kill myself?”

“It starts with a downward dog. You can do a downward dog.”

“Yeah, barely. The whole yoga thing gives you an unfair advantage.”

“Stick your ass in the air and hope for the best, remember?”

Phil does. “Ow.”

“That can’t actually hurt.”

“Not all of us are flexible!”

“You have to at least try the split.”

Phil swings his leg around, getting into his best attempt at a split. 

“This is as close as you’re going to get.” Phil’s pelvis is very far off the ground. 

“You know you just can bend your back leg, right? It’s easier.” Dan asks, pointing at his legs, which are doing that. 

“Nope. I can’t. This is it.” He loses his balance and tips over onto the floor. “Ta-da.”

“Absolute idiot. Be glad I love you.”

“ _ I _ don’t love you. Horrible boyfriend. Every muscle in my body is broken.”

“You can’t break a muscle.”

“You can. I just did.”

Dan stands up and holds a hand out to Phil. “C’mon babe. We’re doing this again.”

“Babuse.” Phil stands up and makes a show of brushing imaginary dust off his ass. “Wait, I can’t remember how it starts.”

“Hitch kick.”

“Right. Which I can’t do.”

“Watch it again.”

Phil watches the dancer three more times. He goes back to replay it again. 

“It’s so  _ fast _ .”

“You know this is slowed down right now.”

Phil puts a hand over his heart. “I’m too young to die.”

“Stop being so fucking dramatic.”

Phil snorts. “Like you’re  _ not _ dramatic?” 

Dan ignores him. 

We couldn’t have started with something easier?” Phil whines. 

“Nothing else was trending on twitter. They asked for WAP, specifically.”

“Ugh.”

“Ready?” Dan asks. 

“What no - ” Phil says but Dan’s already pressed play. 

Phil makes it about a third of the way. 

“Jesus Christ.”

Dan gets more of it than Phil does.

“That’s kind of hot,” Phil says. “Even though you’re not good either.”

“Shut the fuck up.”

“Alright, make me.”

“Absolutely not. Get up. Bitch”

Phil stands up and his knees pop. He winces.

“This song is never going to get out of my head, is it?”

Dan shakes his head. “You have to embrace it. Embrace the wet ass pussy.”

“Please never say that again.”

“It’s not as bad as saying Bryony’s sofa makes your ass clap.”

“In my defense, I thought I was complimenting it.”

“There is literally no defense for that.”

Dan goes to start the video again, the dance now at full speed. 

Dan starts the dance. Phil just stares. 

“Phil!” Dan yells, from where he stopped on the ground. 

“I forgot! I can’t remember a hitch whatever. Or any of the other moves.”

“You’re an absolute idiot.”

“Can we order dominos now? I deserve it.”

Dan grabs a pillow off of the sofa and hits him with it.

Phil never learns the dance, but he does sing the lyrics wrong for the rest of the week. 

**Author's Note:**

> i’m so sorry. reblog on [tumblr](https://fairylocal.tumblr.com/post/627454123738005504/now-from-the-top-ao3-t-900-words-phil-learns).


End file.
